The Mother I Aspire To Be…
01Feb 2017

By: Jessi Kohlhagen

As parents (even the extraordinary Lifebook kind) there is always room for growth. There’s always more we can do. But even more importantly than what we do, there are always different ways we can be with our children… new ways we can show up and be present in each unique gem of a moment.

So this year, I decided to write out some of the intentions I have for my children — these incredible little people that I love more than life itself.

As I do this, I become aware of two distinct feelings:

  1. I experience enormous pride and joy for the unbelievable blessings that my children are in my life… for what incredible people they are turning out to be… and for all the things I’ve done really, really well as their mama.
  1. I experience a yearning, a drive, and even a little guilt for *all* the things I want to be and do that haven’t come to fruition yet.

Here’s a sneak peek into the running list of intentions I have for the future of my family…

This is the mother I aspire to be:

I want to release any expectations I have of them, and fully embrace what they already are.

I want to drop whatever I am doing when they engage with me, and give them my undivided attention.

I want to stop looking at them, and start looking into them. I want to focus on their pupils, observe the color of their irises, notice the subtle changes in their faces as they speak.

I want to explain less and ask more.

I want to teach them to hear the whisper of their spirit, and to trust their inner sense of wisdom, insight, goodness and rightness — above all else.

I want more silence and stillness together, observing and being present.

I want to get dirty, hang upside down, do cartwheels, and roll around on the Earth with them.

I want to climb more trees, and watch more sunsets together.

I want to be less focused on their future, and more in awe of their present.

I want *all* of my maternal thoughts, feelings and actions to be driven by love and faith, instead of fear or doubt.

I want to say YES — all the time, as much as I can.

I want to honor their feelings, and fully embrace all sides of their dynamic human experience.

I want anything and everything to be cause for celebration or ceremony.

I want to honor each transformation with powerful, symbolic rite of passage.

I want to show them how to stay comfortable in their own skin, and feel like they belong on this planet, in this place, in this body, in this moment.

I want to demonstrate the importance of loving and respecting all bodies, most of all their own.

I want to breathe and flow through sticky situations with grace, unwavering calmness, and unlimited compassion and empathy.

I want more cuddles, more wrestles, more hair-braiding and bedtime back scratches. Lots more.

I want to be better animals together, taking more care and responsibility for our interconnectivity to Nature and the world around us.

I want to reduce our wastefulness, increase our positive impact, and devote more energy and awareness to the causes we believe in.

I want to read & read & read together everyday, voyaging to the most vibrant literary worlds ever imagined.

I want a home exploding with creative energy – a living art studio overflowing with paint, colors, plants, crafts, crystals, song & dance, storytelling, passion and imagination.

I want to never stop giving thanks together.

I want to show them everyday what it means to be mindful, happy, grateful, inspired, strong, accepting, open and free.

These are my greatest wishes for the coming years. What are some of yours?

With a full heart and overflowing gratitude,


2 comments “The Mother I Aspire To Be…”

  • Leslie
    February 8, 2017
    12:10 pm

    Beautifully written, Jessi. Instructive and inspiring. Thanks!

  • Dixie-Ann Harris-Gordon
    June 2, 2017
    12:10 pm

    Absolutely heart warming, Jessi. It’s like almost a cut and paste of my own parenting goals and dreams. Thank you so much for the beautiful wording.

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